Practice What You Preach

Almost a month away until the show, and all is well on the Western Front. I realize how much power my thoughts have. At the beginning of this process I stated very clearly that I wasn’t going to do a big fundraiser such as Kickstarter or Indie Go-Go and that I would just work a lot and now I may be facing serious burn out. (Be careful what you wish for right….looking back at it, I wish I said: “and a generous patron of the arts is going to hand me a check for $4000….you hear that universe?) So after teaching so much and literally running from client to client, class to class- I forced myself to change my schedule around a bit so today I can take the day off…although I’ll be heading to ballet and to rehearsal somewhat soon. Back to words being powerful, even the title of this piece holds significance and power. I was banking on my long term collaborator (nickname, H) to come back on board and work his acting magic on this piece but right now H is taking a time out- which ultimately I couldn’t fathom. Obsessing over all the incredible past work we’ve created together-some of my favorite pieces had H at the center of the work, his presence and emotional capacity dominating every moment. I kept thinking, he’ll come back around for sure- I just have to wait this out…. and this is very in line with my character; obsessing over the past, stuck in memories of what worked so well once before and absolutely limiting myself to future possibility. After a month, then two months slowly going by, H did not valiantly ride in on a white horse to save the day. So I began to force myself, reluctantly I might add, to ask other actors to play the “future possibility” role and one by one I either got a flakey-flake or a hard no. I knew I didn’t want to hold an audition and dreaded that long and arduous, perhaps untrustworthy road; so I decided to let any attempt of trying go. I began to put my faith in knowing the perfect actor would arrive, I just had to forget about it. After a few sleepless nights, either due to what I call “choreography brain” or going to bed at a reasonable hour and being wide awake at 2am, I had to surrender to this untamable, wide-eyed energy and decided to hold gratitude in my heart for the work, the dancers, the rehearsal process and the performance. And ZING, lighting struck. The perfect actor came to me at the perfect moment.Whhhhhhaaaa? How in the world did I not think of this before (yes I know, not the right timing) I decided not to contact perfect actor (Robbie Torres) at 2am as that, even for me, may be a bit odd- and constructed my plea later the next day. And within minutes, I got a high flying YES! Holy crap, I started doing a happy dance in the locker room at the yoga studio I teach at, yes in my towel, and yes people were looking at me funny! Yes, yes, yes, thank you, thank you, thank you!

NOW is the day I can mold the clay. Now I can really create my world knowing the awesome soul I’m working with. So dance update: rehearse the solo, create running “daisy”sequence, and then figure out direction for Robbie. Today is going to be a good day!